Have you ever met someone, hit it off, had an AWESOME CONNECTION, then found out they aren’t quite single? What if you met someone you really like a lot but you’re not quite if you’re headed toward exclusivity? I address those issues in this post. I also give my thoughts on dating people aren’t divorced but aren’t married either (separated and don’t APPEAR to be reconciling anytime soon). Enjoy…
Many single people (especially women) have been asked this question. In this series of recordings, I discuss many topics that singles contemplating/meditating/brain farting/ etc. about marriage should think about. Or at least what I think about.
These posts aren’t number exactly right so please forgive any errors in order or labeling.
A few dating and romance coaches have recommended putting together a list of qualities you would like in a mate. I agree and in this posting I’ll share why…
Have you ever had men say “This is why you don’t have a man” or “I seen you’re SINGLE ” then this recording is for you. I’m sharing some thoughts about people (but especially men) who shame women for being single.
When I started this blog, I made up my mind that there would be no postings about how awful and dreadful being single is. This promise includes Valentine’s Day. First things first, HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY, PEEPS!!! As I do on my annual Valentine’s Day post on my Facebook/Twitter account’s, I’m redeeming Valentine’s from the “if you’re half of a couple, you’re a nobody” shadow that makes this holiday a drag. Let this be a day to spread love to those get overlooked because they’re not part of a couple. Visit the elderly, take your kids out, get a bunch of your single unattached friends ( dudes/dudettes, it’s the weekend)and go out or better yet have a gathering at one your homes, visit your parents, send a special Valentine’s Day to the single’s in your contacts on your cell phone, go bowling, etc. And you are fortunate enough to be in a relationship, go to a hotel to spice things up. For those of you who are snowed in, be grateful to have a place to be snowed in, at least no one’s having to arrest you and put you in jail to get you out of the cold (remember the homeless? Yeah, exactly). But however you choose to spend this WONDERFUL holiday, LOVE SOMEBODY. Nothing takes your mind off your own status like demonstrating Christ’s love for mankind. You’re never more like Him than when you love.
In His Name,
Sis Anjanette Potter
Check this out and tell me you think. Revisiting previous love affairs 01/26 by Christine Pembleton | Blog Talk Radio.
This link is to an article I found very thought provoking. Hit me up and let me know what you think about it. It’s about abstinence and obedience.
The first time I saw this episode, I thought it was so funny. Especially when Elaine says, ” David, I’m going to HELL. The worst Place in the world, with devils, caves and ragged clothing and you should be trying to save me. I’m not going to hell and if you think I’m going to hell you should CARE if that I’m going to hell, but I am not going to hell !!!!!”
Now, for the record, I tend to almost be like a lot of men when it comes to these types of relationship talks. You know the kind where the woman asks one those loaded questions like “Honey do these pants make my butt look big?” and there is no really good answer because no matter how the guy answers, it just ain’t gonna be the right answer (which by the way , men do this mess too). However, the more I see this episode, there are things that stand out to me. Like, 1)How long was he planning on continuing to have a sexual relationship with her without bothering to mention that he’s saved? 2) He really doesn’t seem to care that she’s going to hell, yet he just spent the night at her place. 3) For this point, you have to be a regular Seinfleld fan to know this, but, he doesn’t seem to care at all about her destination until the end of the show when he finds out, you guessed it, they’re both going to hell (even the world acknowledges that fornication is still a sin).
So I did a little bit of independent investgating of my own. You see I’m on a journey of my own (preparing for marriage) and I thought about it. With all the talk that has been going on about the “plight” of single Black women, the abstinence issue, the shortage of Black men in church, sermon after sermon about men and their “special needs” (which they remind you of every five seconds). I thought of this episode and thought, you know, I have needs too. And since most men don’t mind MAKING IT PLAIN when it comes to their sexual needs, I thought I’d see who could meet my spiritual needs. So, I asked the question “Do you care where I spend eternity?”
Out of 10 men, that I asked directly (and after posting this same question on my Facebook page). I got two definite yeses, one “Hmmmm…. Not really” one “Huh?” and one question mark and the rest didn’t answer at all. Now before you picture me tying a noose around my neck and kicking a chair over, I must say that rather than discourage me , it encourages me. Especially in the area of sexual abstinence.You see, I look forward to being able meet the sexual needs of my HUSBAND. Not my booty buddy, friend with benefits, married lover, live in lover, but HUSBAND. The Bible defines sex outside marriage as sin (Matt. 5:32; 19:9; John 8:41; Acts 15:20, 29; 21:25; Rom. 1:29; 1 Cor 5:1, 6:13, 18, 7:2; 10:8; 2 Cor 12:21; Gal 5:19; Eph 5:3; Col 3:5; 1 Thess. 4:3; Jude 1:7; Rev. 2:14, 20-21; 9:21; 14:8).So, for someone to constantly badger me about his sexual “needs” but not care at all about my spirit needs says that person is a bit insensitive (wouldn’t you agree?).
After all if I continued to offer my body to someone , in a sexual way , who was desiring to obey God‘s mandate (not suggestion, or even advice) not have sex with anyone they’re not married to, I would be called a few choice names. And he would warned about the spiritual dangers of associating with a woman like me (complete with scriptural references). So why then is it okay for me to put myself in spiritual danger for the sake of someones manly “needs”. Especially someone who’s not patient enough to wait until marriage before feeling entitled to sex with me. I will be blogging on this topic some more so STAY TUNED!!!!!