Do You Care Where I Spend Eternity??? Pt. 1


The first time I saw this episode, I thought it was so funny. Especially when Elaine says, ” David, I’m going to HELL. The worst Place in the world, with devils, caves and ragged clothing and you should be trying to save me. I’m not going to hell and if you think I’m going to hell you should CARE if that I’m going to hell, but I am not going to hell !!!!!”

Now, for the record, I tend to almost be like a lot of  men when it comes to these types of relationship talks. You know the kind where the woman  asks  one those loaded questions like “Honey do these pants make my butt look big?” and there is no really  good answer because no matter how the guy answers, it just ain’t gonna be the right answer (which by the way , men do this mess too). However, the more I see this episode, there are things that stand out to me. Like,  1)How long was he planning on continuing to have a sexual relationship with her without bothering to mention that he’s saved? 2) He really doesn’t seem to care that she’s going to hell, yet he just spent the night at her place. 3) For this point, you have to be a regular Seinfleld fan to know this, but, he doesn’t seem to care at all about her destination until the end of the show when he finds out, you guessed it, they’re both going to hell (even the world acknowledges that fornication is still a sin).

So I did a little bit of independent investgating of my own. You see I’m on a journey of my own (preparing for marriage) and I thought about it. With all the talk that has been going on about the “plight” of single Black women, the abstinence issue, the shortage of Black men in church, sermon after sermon about men and their “special needs” (which they remind you of every five seconds). I thought of this episode and thought, you know, I have needs too. And since most men don’t mind MAKING IT PLAIN when it comes to their sexual needs, I thought I’d see who could meet my spiritual needs.  So, I asked the question “Do you care where I spend eternity?”

Out of 10 men, that I asked directly (and after posting this same question on my Facebook page).   I got two definite yeses, one “Hmmmm…. Not really”  one “Huh?” and one question mark and the rest didn’t answer at all.  Now before you picture me tying a noose around my neck and kicking a chair over, I must say that rather than discourage me , it encourages me. Especially in the area of sexual abstinence.You see, I look forward to being able meet the sexual needs  of my HUSBAND. Not my booty buddy, friend with benefits, married lover, live in lover, but HUSBAND. The Bible defines sex outside marriage as sin (Matt. 5:32; 19:9; John 8:41; Acts 15:20, 29; 21:25; Rom. 1:29; 1 Cor 5:1, 6:13, 18, 7:2; 10:8; 2 Cor 12:21; Gal 5:19; Eph 5:3; Col 3:5; 1 Thess. 4:3; Jude 1:7; Rev. 2:14, 20-21; 9:21; 14:8).So, for someone to constantly badger me about his sexual “needs” but not care at all about my spirit needs says that person is a bit insensitive (wouldn’t you agree?).

After all if I continued to offer my body to someone , in a sexual way , who was desiring to obey God‘s mandate (not suggestion, or even advice) not have sex with anyone they’re not married to, I would be called a few choice names. And he would warned about the spiritual dangers of associating with a woman like me (complete with scriptural references). So why then is it okay for me to put myself in spiritual danger for the sake of someones  manly “needs”.  Especially someone who’s not patient enough to wait until marriage before  feeling entitled to sex with me.  I will be blogging on this topic some more so STAY TUNED!!!!!

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